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Watch This If You've Ever Had A Crush On Someone Else While In A Relationship
Ask E. Jean: I Have a Great Boyfriend, but I'm Curious About Girls
Dear E. Jean: I have an amazing man in my life whom I love. But over the past few years, I've found myself becoming more and more attracted to women. I still love my boyfriend, he makes me happy emotionally and physically, and we've been together six wonderful months, but I just find myself thinking homoerotically all the time. I've never had a physical relationship with a woman besides one instance of making out with a friend in my preteens, which I chalked up as a moment of sexual experimentation. I don't want to lose this incredible man because of my own urges.
Im a girl, I have a boyfriend. I know your all probably thinking that what im thinking is just plain stupid and impossible, and that im being immature. But heres the thing. Im bi-sexual and I'm ashamed of myself enough Nobody really knows except for my boyfriend and he accepts it, which puts a smile on my face. But I'm in love with my best friend at the same time. Lets all remember here im a girl and my best friend is a girl.
I will start by saying that, as confusing as this situation may seem right now, you have a really good head on your shoulders:. First, I want to address the relationship you have with your boyfriend. I know how throwing your bisexuality in the mix can seem to complicate things, but I would like to look at this relationship in a separate context for now. I hear you saying you really like and care for your boyfriend, but also aren't wanting a romantic relationship with him anymore, or at least right now. I get that you really like and care about him, something essential to any friendship or romantic relationship. I totally hear you on that, but I also want to stress the importance of being true to yourself and your feelings. Breaking up with him when you no longer want to be in the relationship, for any reason, may feel hurtful but is most likely the right thing to do in the long run.
In these situations, you have two options: move on, or try anyway. But making the decision between resignation and pursuit can be difficult. And is it acceptable to chase a girl who already has a boyfriend?
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What Girls & Guys Said
I've been with my partner for five years, and we get on well in the bedroom. He is not as adventurous as I, and is quite straight thinking regarding sexuality. I have always had heterosexual relationships, but have also had two female 'playmates'. I love the intimacy between two women. My problem is that I still desire female-female pleasure, but he doesn't know it. I know he won't understand, and it will probably mean the end of us if I mention it. I feel that my longing will not go away.
This special girl that really you like might have been flirting with you, been very friendly towards you and may have even given you the impression that she likes you or finds you attractive. He will then begin to daydream about being her boyfriend and will become fixated on stealing her away from her current guy, so he can have her all to himself. Not the other way around. If you had 3 hot girls interested in you and shared a great connection with each of them, you would just leave this other girl alone to enjoy her relationship with her boyfriend, even if she is unhappy. The thing is, you probably are a really good guy and you probably would treat her nicer than her boyfriend. Most of the guys who want to save a girl from a bad boyfriend are the type who think that the secret to success with women is to be really nice to a woman and treat her like a princess all the time. If you want a girl to like you in a sexual, romantic way, you must be able to trigger her feelings of sexual attraction for you, rather than just making her experience friendly feelings for you.